Sense of an ending...

Tears rushed through her lonely eyes

remains of a lost faith

piercing depths of her soul

this eerie sense of an ending

Cracked lips unable to tremble

silent sobs synchronous with beats

flowing like red in her veins

this eerie sense of an ending

A mayhem of incessant voices

murmuring from nowhere to nowhere

wrapping her like a volcano

this eerie sense of an ending

Crawling stealthy breath after breath

conspiring with time and mind

numbing her from toe to head

this eerie sense of an ending

Tightly gripping every muscle

twisted cords of realization and remorse

shaking her reason of existence

this eerie sense of an ending

Attaching firmly beneath her skin

million cells of painful memories

shielding all hope and happiness

this eerie sense of an ending

 Enveloping even her shadow

like the calmness of a night

terminating life moment by moment

this eerie sense of an ending. 
 

Ab ki baar...VOTER LACHAAR (helpless)!!

Before I proceed, I would like to clarify that this post will not resonate well with those who are blind faithful supporters of Modi (BJP) or congress or AAP or any other political party.

voting - democracy-disappointment

  
'India is the largest democracy in the world' - we have learnt and believed in this since the time we became acquainted with the subject 'social studies' in school. A democracy wherein the leader is chosen 'by the people, for the people and of the people'. 
But now as the 16th Lok Sabha election has already begin I cannot ignore the confusion and helplessness I feel amidst all the tamasha, hullabaloo, mockery and a storm that ironically has arrived ahead of the impending silence and disappointments. 

Being a Delhiite, I am suppose to cast my vote on the 10th of April. Voting is my right, it is suppose to give me not just a sense of power but also satisfaction that yes! I have chosen a leader who will consider my rights and the rights of my fellow countrymen as his prime duty.

And undoubtedly the numerous hoarding costing crores of rupees, loud promises being broadcasted night and day by the print and electronic media drag me to believe in them. They push me to trust that all these leaders are worthy of my vote and my faith.

Then why this confusion? Why do I feel torn between my duty as a citizen of the country and the inner voice which stands disgusted on the very thought of supporting these leaders built on in numerous promises and dreams of prosperity? 

Maybe because the party which promises 'tarakki (progress) and shakti (power) to my hands' failed to do so in the last 5 years. How and why should I trust them again?

Or maybe because a person who promises the 'his sarkar will do chamatkaar' was ruling Gujarat when the riots took place. And I don't say that he was responsible for instigating or promoting them but my fragile heart fears that a man who sat on the throne while some 700 Muslims and 400 Hindus were mercilessly killed and did nothing at all, what am I supposed to expect from him and his sarkar now? 

Curbing corruption has been not just on of our important demands but also the reason why congress failed miserably as a government. And insptie of being wee aware of this fact, the stats have left me completely taken aback. 

'30 per cent of candidates fielded by both parties have criminal charges against them; of them 13 per cent face serious charges like murder and kidnapping.
35 per cent of the BJP's candidates face criminal charges, of them 17 percent are serious charges. Meanwhile, 27 per cent of Congress' candidates face criminal charges, with 10 per cent facing serious charges.'  Source here.

How do these so called progress loving parties expect us to vote and support members who have allegedly murdered someone, looted and robbed us of our hard earned money. And not just one or two but 35% of the total? 
Is this the kind of democracy we live in and proudly associate our self with?

I do not know about others but as a girl who has been taught honesty, values and instilled with morals like 'lying, murdering, cheating are heinous crimes' my mind shudders on the very thought of pressing the button in support of leaders accused of the same.
My conscience abhors the thought of choosing a murderer or a thief to decide how I live, what I see, the college in study in, the jobs I get paid for and all other innumerable aspects of my everyday life and not just mine but the lives of those I love, my family, friends, neighbours etc.

Yet I am expected to vote. It is expected of me to exercise my right and fulfill my duty. 

Is this me playing a part of a respnsible citizen or is it me supporting an irresponsible leader?

will the blue ink bring in a sense of power to me or will it fill my heart with guilt and disgust?

I know not. But all I see is a choice between responsibility and my morals. but aren't the two interconnected? Isn't my responsibility encompassed within the values I uphold? It indeed is.

So what will I be doing on this 10th of April? who shall I support and who shall I reject? 
Is NOT voting the only sensible thing to do? so that later I can at least live guilt free when God forbid another riot takes place in some part of the country killing people like me and the sarkar does nothing to stop it? 
The more I think, the more I feel helpless. A puppet of delusional democracy
Don't you feel the same? If yes, where lies the solution? 


PS : After much thought and weighing a handful options I left with, I decided that I shall vote. And I will vote for someone who is not at least having charges and blames that repel my conscience. No matter what party or person is it. 
And if I feel that there is none worthy of the same, I shall back out. I will not let my hand for the support and encouragement of things that abhor my very soul for the sake of
responsibility.

Leonardo DiCaprio - the hunk of my dreams!

awesomeness personified!

I was wondering that I so proudly boast my love for Leonardo DiCaprio in every nook and corner of the real and virtual world, be it my blog's about me section (oh! you haven't cared to read it even once? what a shame! minimize this window, open my blog on the other one and READ IT I say and then return back to continue this post!)

back? So you read it! great, lets proceed. So whenever I actually describe myself, I have to blurt out Leo's name some where or the other. That makes me wonder, where should I put his name in my official resume? If you have any idea, be kind and let know pleaseee!

The not so latest 'your Facebook movie' trend ( I know, it flopped) saw my movie featuring Leo more than me. No! not the wall street type Leo. He was a cocaine and 'f'' king in that. In my movie however, he was my prince *blush*

I get more wishes and messages (now whats-apps) on his birthday than I ever got on mine. I mean that's obvious because early in the morning I message people that its my love's birthday (like they care) and some of them are kind enough to reply and some of them are just plain guilty because they had forgotten to wish me on my birthday!

And oh that reminds me that on the Oscar Night (morning in India), my phone buzzed incessantly with Whats apps informing me that Leo lost. Some of them were concerned enough to ask me 'are you fine?'. Oh come onnn! You thought that I am so blinded by louuveee that I expected a 'drug addict wolf' of the wall street to win against Mathew Mcconaughy?  (or whichever way you correctly spell his name :/ )
obviously not! And the jury of academy with their feet in their graves would have never let Leo get an Oscar for roles such as these! yes, they are the Alok Nath's of Hollywood;)
So I am a sensible lover you see *sheepish grin*

OK now enough of honesty. I had started writing this post with an intent to praise Leo to the skies or maybe as high as that 'lemon wala drug' took him in wall street or maybe straight to the heavens like he went after titanic, the quick and the dead and Romeo and Juliet!
So please don't bring in Oscars again and again. They are over for this year and Leo and I have moved on. end of discussion.

 *now tone change*

Leonardo DiCaprio is the greatest actor ever born. (what? this is my post and my blog, kindly bear with the lies and superlatives)
A heart throb, most amazing, astonishing, astounding, awesome, fabulous, miraculous, prodigious,stunning, stupendous, wonderful, unbelievable,extraordinary, phenomenal,sensational, spectacular,notable,outstanding, remarkable; impressive, smashing, mind-blowing + boggling + blinding (wait! does such a word even exist? I guess not but then love blinds every organ of the body so I will keep it) attractive, enchanting,enthralling actor ever!

What are you marveling at now, Leo's attributes or my vocabulary? whatever it be, both have been created by me :P

I have a million and more reasons why I completely and madly love Di Caprio. But PDA is so not my kinda thing! which is way I will just share 5 reasons (that may interest you too or if they don't, ACT interested at least on my blog) down here. So here we go

1. He played the character of Jack Dawson with such panache that absolutely no one could or would EVER be able to surpass! I mean, the love in his eyes, 'you jump,I jump' and the way he sacrifices his plank for that stupid, confused girl. You tell me, will you sacrifice your life if you were in place of him? And that too for Kate Winslet? Although she considers him the best actor of his generation but still?!

2. Apart from the acting talent and the skill of changing girl friends once in a week month year, he has been an active wildlife and nature conservationist.

3. I really love him for saying things like "I prefer ordinary girls - you know, college students, waitresses, that sort of thing. Most of the girls I go out with are just good friends. Just because I go out to the cinema with a girl, it doesn't mean we are dating." keeps my hope so much alive! :D

4. The academy has been constantly disappointing him and his fans but still he puts up with a brave face and keeps coming up with such wonderful movies consistently and that too of the kinds which Academy would never approve of (remember I told you about the Alok Nath's? ). 
This clearly show, he is amazingly talented and not 'dying' or 'acting' for Oscars.

5. His voice- I am madly in love with his voice. It just keeps ringing and murmuring in my ears. 

And if you aren't convinced yet then I present to you a song written by a Dutch- girl band K3 called 'Leonardo DiCaprio I love you'. Read the translation here

There can't be a better tribute of love to this great actor. And the second best tribute? well you just read it :P